Jessica Alba's bending over

IT's funny how the internet makes mega stars out of everyone. I think about all of Jessica Alba's movies and can't name many of them. Despite that, she's very famous. I'm not sure if she's as rich as people think she is. But who cares. She has an ass that is almost identical to Eva Longoria's. Which one would you rather lick?

Mena Suvari's bikini bottom

I have to hand it to Mena Suvari - for a white chick, she has a fantastic ass and her body isn't aging. I'd fuck her up and down, which for me means a whole 30 to 45 seconds.

Heather Locklear's miniskirt

Heather Locklear. Those who know me know I love the MILFs. I also have jacked to Heather before.

Mariah Carey's ass

I remember jacking to Mariah almost every day some years ago. Not much has changed with her - still an ass and legs to die for. Anyway I just wanted to say that my gripe of the day is real estate agents and the whole real estate industry. It is by far the most crooked industry around. Every day millions of high school drop outs make tons of money for unlocking doors and fucking people over.

Eva Mendes skirt

She should be showing more skin in these pictures, I agree.

Padma Lakshmi's upskirt

Well Indian chicks never really did it for me. However, I'm sure they make one of the best wives ever based on their culture, family values, etc. I heard the mayor of LA has been trying to bang Padma.

Hilary Duff's spandex

Hilary Duff is nice. About my rant earlier on about how everybody is money grubbing: it's true. I guess you guys think I'm cynical. But I suppose every day brings new things. At the end of the day it is very true that all that matters is how we handle ourselves and not take the shit around us very seriously. Let the pigs roll around in the mud after their dinero (that's espanish for money).